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Vol. I — No. 1Subscribe Free

The Daily Babel

Strengthening faith through satire since the tower fell.

More Headlines

Man at kitchen table staring at his smartwatch with an expression of quiet resignation
Technology

Man's Fitness Tracker Begins Sending Unsolicited Weekly Health Reports to His Emergency Contacts

Device's 'Share Progress' feature, enabled during initial setup, has been forwarding resting heart rate and sleep data to his mother for eleven months.

Ezra Kim · March 18, 2026

Man on couch late at night showing his phone screen to an uninterested woman beside him
Technology

Man Switches Phone to Grayscale to Curb Addiction, Spends 40 Minutes Showing Everyone His Grayscale Phone

Derek Hollis, 38, reports the experiment was a complete success.

Ezra Kim · March 17, 2026

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